1. 什么是美国幽默 英语任务型阅读答案
美国是什么。
2. 哪里有幽默的英语阅读理解
推荐《新概念英语2》给你，课文不会太长，而且难度不大。虽然不是专门的阅读理解题，但很多课文都很幽默。如果你觉得过于简单，可以看看第三册。去试试吧
3. 求一些简单的英语阅读试题 谢谢了。
The students were having their chemistry class. Miss Li was telling the children what water was like. After that, she asked her students, “What’s water?” No one．Miss Li asked again，“Why don’t you answer my question？Didn’t I tell you what water is like？”
Just then a boy put up his hand and said，“Miss Li，you told us that water has no color and no smell．But where to find such kind of water？The water in the river behind my house is always black and it has a bad smell．”Most of the children agreed With him．
“I’m sorry，children．”said the teacher，“Our water is getting dirtier and dirtier．That’s a problem．”
1．The students were having their _______ class．
A．English B．Chinese C．chemistry D．math
2．Miss Li was telling the children what ______ was like.
A．water B．air C．earth D．weather
3．A boy said，“The water in the river behind my house is always ___．”
A．white B．black C．clean D．clear
4．Most of the children _______ the boy．
A．agreed with B．wrote to
C．heard from D．sent for
5．The water in the river has color and smell because it is getting ____．
A．more and more B．less and less
C．cleaner and cleaner D．dirtier and dirtier
key
C A B A D
Jim is an English boy. He comes to China with his father and mother. They come here to work. Jim comes here to study.
He is in No.5 Middle School. He gets up early every day. He isn’t late for school. He studies hard. He can read English well. He often helps us with our English, and we often help him with his Chinese. After class he likes playing football, swimming, running, jumping and riding. He makes many friends here. We are glad to stay with him. On Sunday he often helps his mother clean the house, mend something or do the shopping. He likes Chinese food very much.。
He likes living here. He likes Chinese students very much. We all like him, too.
根据短文内容，判断以下句子的正误。对的在括号内填“ T ”, 错的填“ F ”.
( )1. He gets up late every day.
( )2. He often teaches us English.
( )3. After class , he likes singing and playing basketball.
( )4. On Sunday he often helps his mother clean the house.
( )5. He doesn’t like Chinese food.
key
F T F T F
4. 带有问题的英语简单幽默小短文
学英文的轨迹是这样的。先什么都不会，能写出来就不错;后来会点词就拼命装X结果不得要领;后来知道简洁为好，能表达出意思就够，最NB的就是知道什么时候用什么词，对词义的差别掌握的很透彻，句式很多样，native speaker能很自然的看懂并欣赏。这一级别需要很长时间练就，我估计一般老外都不见得那么熟练地驾驭词汇。
连词篇：(介词，副词)
Firstly: previously, beforehand, foremost, initially, originally, formerly, principally, mainly, essentially, basically, generally, commonly, universally, on the whole, fundamentally, to begin with, to start with, first of all, at the outset…
Then: subsequently, afterward, thereafter, after that, succeeding (adj.), secondarily, what is more, furthermore (further more)
Lastly: ultimately, eventually, in conclusion, to conclude, as a final point, last of all, last but not least, finally…
Too: as well (句末), in addition, besides, moreover, additionally, to boot, excessively, also…
And: plus, as well as, along with, in addition, bonus, with…
+Or: otherwise, if not, before, or else…
So (adv): therefore, thus, consequently, accordingly, as a result, for that reason, hence, that’s why
Because: as, e to, since, as to, in that, for the reason that, for, now that…
But:however, moreover, nevertheless, nonetheless, on the contrary, on the other hand, 让步although, even thought, though, even if, while, as, despite the fact that…
Only: just, merely, barely, singly, solely, rarely…
Without: excluding,
Very: extremely, acutely, decidedly, deeply, exceedingly, greatly, highly, uncommonly, profoundly, unusually…
Actually: as a matter of fact, indeed, in fact, in point of fact, in reality, in truth, literally, truly …
形容词/副词
Important: essential, significant, vital, crucial, profound, play a pushing role,indispensable, requisite, critical, fundamental, primary, elementary, underlying, rudimentary, basically, necessary…
-附加-傻句替换：I think that A is more important than B. (这是经典大傻句!以下句中的'important'可随意替换同义词)
1. A is important to B.
2. A plays an/aimportant role to B.
3. A is of (great\enormous\significant\awesome) to B.
4. B can not (live\developed\grow\survive\achieve) without A.
5. A means (a lot\a great deal\much) to B.
6. The importance of A (to B) can never be (exaggerated\denied\ignored\doubted).
7. A is everything/the whole world to B.
8. B is fundamental on A.
9. A matters/counts to B.
10. Nothing is more crucial to B than A.
11. A is to B what the (foundation is to a skyscraper\water is to fish\the heart is to a human)
Big: gigantic, massive, colossal, enormous, immense, gargantuan, tremendous, titanic, giant, vast, large, huge, monster, bulky,
->many: numerous, myriad, infinite,
->forever (adv): infinity, eternal, timeless, everlasting，undying, endless, changeless, perpetually…
Small: minimum, diminutive, minute, petite, wee, undersized, teeny, tiny, little, petite(女子身高娇小)
Good: marvelous, fabulous, gorgeous, spectacular, outstanding, distinguished, remarkable, superb, incredible, unbelievable, out of this world, magnificent, charming, stunning, fantastic, terrific, excellent, great, wonderful, amazing, awesome
Bad: awful, terrible, dreadful, defective, faulty, imperfect, inadequate, poor, substandard, unsatisfactory, harmful, damaging, deleterious, detrimental, hurtful, ruinous, unhealthy, evil, immoral…
Clever: brilliant, knowledgeable, intellectual, intelligent, excellent, bright, smart
Happy: delightful, delectable, elated, glad, overjoyed, pleased, jubilant, merry, joyful,
Beautiful: charming, charismatic, attractive, gorgeous, pretty, endearing, sweet, adorable, eye-catching, handsome, hot, cute, good-looking, lovable, engaging…
Fast：swift, quick, rapid, speedy, hasty, nippy, like lightning,
+hurry (v): hustle, rush, make haste, tear, step on it, dash, get a move on, step on it, scoot.
Easy: simple, effortless, no trouble, painless, plain sailing, uncomplicated, undemanding, unproblematic, a piece of cake (informal), child’s play (informal),…
Clear: obvious, apparent, blatant, comprehensible, conspicuous, distinct, evident, manifest, palpable, plain, pronounced, recognizable, transparent, intelligible, lucid, plain, understandable, uninvolved, simple, …
Direct: bald, basic, frank, naked, plain, sincere, stark, straightforward, candid, forthright, outspoken….
Difficult: hard, tricky, complicated, complex, intricate, involved, knotty, perplexing, puzzling, thorny…
Angry: annoyed, cross, displeased, enraged, exasperated, incensed, infuriated, irate, mad (informal), livid (informal), berserk, outraged, resentful...
Dangerous: perilous, breakneck, chancy (informal), hazardous, insecure, precarious, risky, unsafe, vulnerable
动词
Think (that): hold the (opinion/ belief/ position/stand point/idea) that, assume, believe, deem, reckon, argue, maintain, suppose, conceive, insist, be convinced, to my knowledge, personally, from my personal perspective, as far as I am concerned, from my point of view, from my angle, consider, conceive, perspective...
Show: convey, reveal, express, corroborate, justify, imply, verify, clarify, signify, exemplify, illuminate, substantiate, demonstrate, elucidate, denote, characterized as, instruct, display, disclose, indicate, means, explain, give an/a example (reason, explanation) of, bear out, point out, point toward…
Know: realize, comprehend, identify, distinguish, discern, notice, perceive, recognize, see, understand, figure out, be acquainted with, be familiar with,
Get: acquire, attain, acquire, achieve, obtain, gain “学习” 不用learn
Suggest: have a proposal in,
Increase: magnify, expand, proliferate, mushroom, improve, enhance, advance…
Impress: affect, inspire, engrave on, imprint of,
Influence: impact, affect, guide, sway,
Stop: halt, cease, conclude, desist, end, pause, put an end to, quit, refrain, shut down, terminate…
Make: create, assemble, built, construct, form, manufacture; fore, cause, compel, constrain, drive, impel, ince, oblige, prevail, upon, require…
Give: present, award, contribute, deliver, donate, grant, hand over, hand out, provide, supply
Break：separate, burst, crack, destroy, disintegrate, fracture, fragment, shatter, smash, snap
Destroy: ruin, raze, annihilate, crush, demolish, devastate, eradicate, shatter, wipe out, wreck, obliterate, weaken, undermine…
Happen: occur, come about, come to pass, develop, result, take place, transpire
名词
Problem: issue,question, case, trouble, difficulty, dilemma.
Meeting: conference, discussion, assembly, conclave, congress, convention, gathering session, assignation, encounter, confrontation, argument, controversy…
Study: learning, application, lessons, reading, research, school work, examination, analysis, consideration, contemplation, inspection, investigation, knowledge,scholarship…
Advantage: benefit, dominance, precedence, profit, superiority, merit…
Disadvantage: shortcoming, weakness, inconvenience, drawback, deficiency, flaw, handicap (also v. 妨碍), downside, limitation.
Life: existence, conct, life style, way of life
5. 跪求一篇英语小短文，幽默一点的，词数在100~150左右。最好带有3个问题，就像做英语阅读一样。。
A Mistake
An American, a Scot and a Canadian were killed in a car accident. They arrived at the gates of heaven, where a flustered St. Peter explained that there had been a mistake. "Give me $500 each," he said, "and I'll return you to earth as if the whole thing never happened."
"Done!" said the American. Instantly, he found himself standing unhurt near the scene.
"Where are the others?" asked a medic.
"Last I knew," said the American, "the Scot was haggling price, and the Canadian was arguing that his government should pay."
搞错了
一位美国人，一位英格兰人和一位加拿大人在一场车祸中丧生。他们到达天堂的门口。在那里，醉醺醺的圣彼德解释说是搞错了。“每人给我五百美元，”他说，“我将把你们送回人间，就象什么都没有发生过一样。”
“成交!”美国人说。立刻，他发现自己毫不损伤地站在现场附近。
“其他人在哪儿？”一名医生问道。
“我离开之前，”那名美国人说，“我看见英格兰人正在砍价，而那名加拿大人正在分辩说应该由他的政府来出这笔钱。”
6. 英语幽默阅读理解
1不能说老师没被警告过
言下之意就是老师长得真不咋地
2童言无忌
3thank
you
，sir，i
wont
do
it
again。专 Anyway，i
dont
like
being
ugly
。
原创答案
希望楼主采属纳
O(∩_∩)O谢谢
7. 最简单的英语阅读理解，
短文大意：来
“一个工作在源小办公室的职员发现办公室里的文件多得放不下了。
于是，他给经理写了个纸条，建议经理把旧的用不着的文件都拿走毁掉。
经理回复他说可以，不过在毁掉之前，这个职员必须要把所有的文件都复制一遍。”
经理回答巧妙，文件重要，不能销毁。
补充：
您原先的问题问的是：
“幽默在哪里啊 是说这个经理回答地很巧妙、， 那些文件都很重要、不能销毁，， 还是在讽刺经理啊 ？”
既然您问了幽默在哪里，那就应该是在短文的最后总经理说的话里。既然是幽默短文，知道乐在何处就行了，不用分析公司管理体制等内容了。否则分析的内容就多了。
补充：
应该是选“A”。不过不是说明经理愚蠢，题目的意思是“经理的话对那个职员有什么意义”。那肯定是“没意义”了。
8. 一个有趣的英语阅读理解题~~~高手请帮帮忙啊~~急~~
Denis是依照字母表的顺序，用正常字母的前一个字母来替代它而写成的信
还原后就是专
Come at midnight and have the thirtn(此处怀疑楼主打属错了）pounds with you
所以答案1是 B
答案2 是D
9. 求一篇英文幽默短文,附带阅读理解题目
On the first day of college,the Dean addressed the students,pointing out some of the rules:"The female dormitory will be out-of-bounds for all male students,and the male dormitory to the female students.Anybody caught breaking this rule will be fined $20 the first time." He continued:"Anybody caught breaking this rule the second time will be fined $60.Being caught a third time will incur a hefty fine of $180.Are there any questions?"
this point,a male student in the crowd inquired:"How much for a season pass?"
10. 内容是美国式幽默或幽默的英语文章(阅读理解,短文也可)
http://www.taohai.com/cn/newsdetail.asp?id=2547
这个是老友记的剧本，里面都是美式幽默。。你可以看看～
或者
TGIF vs SHIT
a man met a blond in the elevator.
he greeted her: "T-G-I-F"
but got the reply: "S-H-I-T"
he was startled, but repeated "T-G-I-F"
again the reply was "S-H-I-T"
he was frustrated and said: "T-G-I-F, I mean Thanks God It's Friday"
the blond looked at him saying: "S-H-I-T, I mean Sorry Honey It's Thursday"
http://www.chinaunix.net/jh/33/545296.html