❶ 求四人英語搞笑短劇劇本 四五分鍾左右
《老友記S01E04台詞》
藍帽子：（對護士說）Excuse me?
護士：（對電話說）It saysto call this number if you』re not completely satisfied with this candy bar.Well, I』m not completely satisfied.（停頓）well, but the labelpromised that nutty goodness.
藍帽子：（對護士說）Listen, it』s kind of an emergency. Well, I guess you know that, orwe』d be in the predicament room.（乾笑）
護士：（不耐煩的看著藍帽子,手裡仍拿著電話）Holdon. Fill these out, sit over there.（扔給藍帽子一個表格）
（藍帽子接過表格）
歪鼻子：（捂著鼻子跑過來對護士說）Look, I don』t wanna make any troble, okay. But I』m in a lot of painhere, alright? My face is danted.
護士：（拿著電話看著手裡的巧克力，一眼都不看歪鼻子說）Well,you』ll have to wait your turn.
白衣服：（對護士說）Well, how long do you think it』ll be?
護士：（仍拿著電話看向白衣服說）Any minute now.（譏笑）
歪鼻子：（對護士說）Hey miss.
（護士凶惡的看向三人，三人被嚇得後退一步後坐在了一旁的沙發上）
（歪鼻子接受完治療回來）
藍帽子：（指向歪鼻子）Heyman!
白衣服：（同時喊道）Heybuddy!
歪鼻子：Hi！（然後把表格輕松的丟在桌子上，看向了護士）
護士：（冷漠）Oh, that』sattractive.（譏笑）
藍帽子：（對護士說）Oh, I thought you were great in Silence of the lambs.（偷笑）
（歪鼻子和白衣服冷眼看著白帽子）
藍帽子：（對歪鼻子說）Ohcome on, admit it! All things considered, you had fun tonight.
歪鼻子：（反問藍帽子）Fun?Where was the fun? Tell me specifically, which part was the fun part? （問白衣服）Whereis my puck?
白衣服：（轉身指向小孩子說道）Oh,ah. The kid has it.
歪鼻子：（順著白衣服指的方向走過去）The kid..?
（三人走向那個小孩子）
歪鼻子：（對小孩說）Excuseme, uh, that』s, that』s my puck.
小孩子：（轉頭面對歪鼻子說）Ifound it.（並得意的說）Finders keepers, losers weepers.
藍帽子：（歪鼻子和藍帽子對視一眼，藍帽子叉腰無奈）You gotta doit, man.
歪鼻子：（底氣不足）Ohyeah? Well, I』m rubber, you』re glue, whatever you …?（轉頭對藍帽子說）Can』tdo it. （藍帽子聳肩拍拍歪鼻子轉身走開）
歪鼻子：（無奈繼續對小孩說）Listenuh… gimme back my puck.
小孩：（果斷且頭也不回）No.
歪鼻子：（去搶小孩手裡的東西）』Yes』,how about. （小孩：No.）Come here. （小孩：No.）Gimme!（小孩：No!）
護士：Hey! Hey!No rough holding in my ER!
歪鼻子&小孩：（拉扯中）Give memy puck!!!
（Puck突然被奪飛，飛向了護士的頭，護士被砸暈了。三人對視）
歪鼻子：（驚楞了一下，對白衣服說）…Nowthat was fun.
❷ 關於英語四級的笑話
有個人准備考英語四級~吃早餐的時候特地買了一根油條和兩個雞蛋~圖個100分的好兆頭（回四級沒改革以前滿分是答100）~
但是吃完油條敲第一個蛋開的時候他發現那顆是雙黃蛋~猶豫再三~他只吃了這個雙黃的~還留下個沒吃~
四級成績公布時他驚呼：「真准！」哥們兒都擠過來瞧~是挺準的——18分。
❸ 英語搞笑短劇， 4人，10分鍾左右。急！好了多加分
Introction）： Long ago there was a crazy country, in this crazy country there were some crazy people, trying to show the crazy history by crazy ways. Mr Jingke was the most famous swordsman and was sent to kill king of Qing, 「Yingzheng」. But finally he failed. Do you want to know what happened at that time? Okay, next show will tell you the truth.Action I太子丹（上，掏出鏡子梳頭，做自戀狀）：
Mirror, mirror, tell me, who is the most pretty man in the world? (畫外音：It』s you, Prince Dan! 太子丹高興狀) Thank u mirror! （面對觀眾）
I』m Prince Dan, the magic mirror said I am the most attractive man in the world. But Ying Zheng is a jealous guy, I feel he will kill me if mirror told him the truth. I am so scared. So what can I do? (向幕里大叫) Where is my minister?
阿三(畢恭畢敬) : Honey, I am coming.
太子丹：I』ve told you again and again that you should call me 「my most beautiful、graceful 、handsome、charming、cute、smart and dearest Prince Dan」!
阿三：Sure, honey! I have a good idea. We can find a hero to kill YingZheng~~~
（作殺狀）太子：Oh yeah~~~. What is the most expensive commodity in this century? Talent!（二十一世紀最需要的是什麼，人才！這句話要跟觀眾交流，最好由觀眾來回答，然後拍阿三肩膀，做贊許狀） Good idea! But who is the right candidate?
阿三：After screening I have two promising persons on hand. One is Miss LiMoChou, the other is Mr JinKe. Tomorrow they will PK for the NO1 killer of the world.
太子：Well, show me the winner as soon as possible, OK?
阿三：Yes.Action II（《十面埋伏》中劉德華&金成武決斗時的音樂）荊軻Are you Li mochou?李莫愁Yes.荊軻OK. I』m Jingke, you know, I will let you know I am the king of the killers』 world.李莫愁Are you challenging me?
荊軻Off course! 聳聳肩表示同意李莫愁Come on!音樂起兩人沖上前來「人在江湖漂啊，哪有不挨刀啊，一刀砍死你啊，兩刀砍死你啊。。。。」李莫愁倒地荊軻大笑李莫愁痛苦狀：What happened? Why aren』t you hurt?荊軻: We don\'t need any reason to win a person. Don\'t we? Do we? （贏一個人需要理由么，不需要麼，需要麼？）李莫愁：Momma always said: \"Life is like a box of chocolates, Mochou. You never know what you\'re gonna get.\" I got it, Momma is right.
荊軻再次大笑太子丹上（抱拳）：How are you?
荊柯：Fine, thank you, and you?太子丹：Oh my God! Could you give me an innovative answer to 「How are you」?
荊柯：Sure!太子丹：How are you?
（鄙人找不到後半部分，特來求救） 提問者： 冰魄の影魂 - 初級魔法師 三級 答復 共 3 條 荊柯：Fine, thank you, and your wife? 太子丹暈倒荊柯：Hey, man, I』m kidding! 太子丹：Oh, I』m kidding too!（畢恭畢敬）May I have your name card, please? 荊軻從兜里掏出一卷紙，上面寫著： To be or not to be, that's a question. 阿三：Hero，we need your help. 荊柯：I am busy now! 太子丹：You can get a lot of money. 荊柯：I am very busy now! 阿三：IC, ID, IQ card? 荊柯：I am very very busy now! 阿三(手指上場的美女，激動狀): Look! She is the most beautiful girl in the world. If you say O.K., she is yours. 荊柯（流口水）：I have to say she is a very sexy and beautiful girl, but TCM is my only love! 阿三：What? What』s the TCM? 荊柯; Hey, guy! You look so smart but why you didn』t know TCM? Any of them can give you the answer. 阿三：Excuse me? What』s the TCM? 觀眾甲：TCM - Traditional Chinese MM . 太子丹：I must show you the trump card. Ladies and gentlemen, this is Lipton Slimming tea. It is a brand new proct of Unilever China. 荊柯（激動）：Slimming tea! I have dreamed of it for thousands of times. My wife always threatens to leave me if I couldn』t rece my weight. 阿三：You want? Speak up if you want! Why do you keep silent? Why are you looking at me? Although your eyes are full of sincerity, I』m very glad, you still have to speak up. Take it! Do you really like? Really?你不是真的想要吧？難道你真的想要嗎…… （《No matter》音樂起，荊軻先與阿三跳探戈，擁入懷中，又甩出去，阿三做嘔吐狀。然後荊軻與太子丹跳倫巴，最後太子丹擺一個女性化的造型，向後彎腰並抬其中一條腿，荊軻做調戲狀。）荊柯(誠懇狀) Just tell me what should I do? I will do anything for you. 太子丹與阿三（撞胯，擊掌）Yeah! Action Ш （《大話西遊》主題曲響起）荊珂挽著妻子，太子丹,阿三在後. 阿三：Hero, we have already reached Yishui River. 荊珂：Just stop here, please. Farewell, my friends 太子丹：I will miss you, baby. （太子丹，阿三下。停頓。《泰坦尼克號》主題曲起，荊軻與妻子做Jack和rose在船頭的經典造型，忽然荊軻看到一個美女——此時一個中國古典美女經過，向荊軻拋媚眼，並拋下定情手絹。荊軻高興的盯著美女看，妻子發覺不對，扭過頭來。）荊珂（急忙收斂）：Darling, I love you. 妻子：I love you! You mean more to me than anything in this whole world!（《肖申克的救贖》）荊珂(流淚) ：I love you more. In spite of you and me and the whole silly world going to pieces around us, I love you. (哪怕是世界末日我都會愛著你，選自《飄》) 妻子：Well. Be a man, just do it! I will be right here waiting for you. 荊珂（欲走還留，執子之手又曰）：Sweetheart! You must do me this honor... promise me you will survive... that you will never give up... no matter what happens... no matter how hopeless... promise me now, and never let go of that promise（泰坦尼克號沉船時，Jack對Rose的傾訴）. 妻子:"I promise." 荊軻:"Never let go. 「 妻子:"I promise. I will never let go, Jack. I'll never let go." （荊軻的發音和jack很像，所以加了一些《泰坦尼克號》的台詞。）妻子努力擠出幾滴眼淚，荊珂上船，漸漸遠去妻子：It』s a good day to die. Never come back. Never…… Never…… 妻子(掏出手機撥號，阿三接手機)： Thank you very much. As soon as I get the life assurance $1000, 000, I will transfer half of it, $500,000 to your account. 阿三：Okay okay! 旁白：Then Jingke was sent to Qin and finally killed by Yingzheng.
參考資料網站有更多選擇。
❹ 搞笑英語四級視頻
http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XMTgyNzA4NjM2.html
是這個吧。。希望能幫到專你。屬。
❺ 有關要不要考 怎麼考 英語4級的幽默段子 3分鍾
小鎮來的廟里，一群人源在上香。
突然，一陣煙霧騰起，黑無常現身了，人們驚恐萬狀，紛紛逃跑。
只有一個老頭端坐不動。
黑無常殺氣騰騰地沖上去問他：「你是誰？你竟敢不怕我？」
「你有什麼好怕的，我和你姐姐都結婚48年了。」老頭漠然地說。
❻ 四人英語搞笑故事帶翻譯，最好每句都帶翻譯，跪求啊
1.I had an amusing experience last year. After I had left a small village in the south of France, I drove on to the next town. On the way, a young man waved to me. I stopped and he asked me for a lift. As soon as he had got into the car, I said good morning to him in French and he replied in the same language. Apart from a few words, I do not know any French at all. Neither of us spoke ring the journey. I had nearly reached the town, when the young man suddenly said, very slowly, "Do you speak English?' As I soon learnt, he was English himself!'
2.The secretary told me that Mr. Harmsworth would see me. I felt very nervous when I went into his office. He did not look up from his desk when I entered. After I had sat down, he said that business was very bad. He told me that the firm could not afford to pay such large salaries. Twenty people had already left. I knew that my turn had come.
'Mr.Harmsworth,' I said in a weak voice.
'Don't interrupt,' he said.
Then he smiled and told me I would receive an extra thousand pounds a year!
3.After I had had lunch at a village pub, I looked for my bag. I had left it on a chair beside the door and now it wasn't there! As I was looking for it, the landlord came in.
'Did you have a good meal?" he asked.
'Yes, thank you,' I answered, 'but I can't pay the bill. I haven't got my bag.'
The landlord smiled and immediately went out. In a few minutes he returned with my bag and gave it back to me.
'I'm very sorry,' he said. 'My dog had taken in into the garden. He often does this!'收起
小木lonely2011-09-18
❼ 四個英語經典搞笑故事
My First and My Last
When George was thirty-five, he bought a small plane and learned to fly it. He soon became very good and made his plane do all kinds of tricks.
George had a friend. His name was Mark. One day George offered to take Mark up in his plane. Mark thought, "I've travelled in a big plane several times, but I've never been in a small one, so I'll go."
They went up, and George flew around for half an hour and did all kinds of tricks in the air.
When they came down again, Mark was very glad to be back safely, and he said to his friend in a shaking voice, "Well, George, thank you very much for those two trips in your plane."
Gerogy was very surprised and said, "Two trips?"
"Yes, my first and my last," answered Mark.
第一次與最後一次
喬治35歲時買了架小型飛機，並開始學習駕駛。不久，他就能很嫻熟地駕機做各種各樣的特技飛行了。
喬治有個朋友名叫馬克。一天，喬治主動邀請馬克乘他的飛機上天兜一圈。馬克心想，「我乘大客機飛行過好幾次，還從來沒有乘過小飛機，我不妨試一試。」
升空後，喬治飛了有半個小時，在空中做了各種各樣的飛行特技。
後來他們著陸了。馬克很高興能夠安全返回地面。他用顫抖的聲音對他的朋友說：「喬治，非常感謝你讓我乘小飛機做了兩次飛行。」
喬治非常吃驚地問：「兩次飛行？」
「是的，我的第一次和最後一次。」馬克答道。
First Flight
Mr. Johnson had never been up in an aerophane before and he had read a lot about air accidents, so one day when a friend offered to take him for a ride in his own small phane, Mr. Johnson was very worried about accepting. Finally, however, his friend persuaded him that it was very safe, and Mr. Johnson boarded the plane.
His friend started the engine and began to taxi onto the runway of the airport. Mr. Johnson had heard that the most dangerous part of a flight were the take-off and the landing, so he was extremely frightened and closed his eyes.
After a minute or two he opened them again, looked out of the window of the plane, and said to his friend, "Look at those people down there. They look as small as ants, don't they?"
"Those are ants," answered his friend. "We're still on the ground."
第一次坐飛機
約翰遜先生從前未乘過飛機，他讀過許多關於飛行事故的報道。所以，有一天一位朋友邀請他乘自己的小飛機飛行時，約翰遜先生非常擔心，不敢接受。不過，由於朋友不斷保證說飛行是很安全的，約翰遜先生終於被說服了，登上了飛機。
他的朋友啟動引擎開始在機場跑道上滑行。約翰遜先生聽說飛行中最危險的是起飛與降落，所以他嚇得緊閉雙眼。
過了一兩分鍾，他睜開雙眼朝窗外望去，接著對朋友說道：「看下面那些人，他們看起來就象螞蟻一樣小，是不是？」
「那些就是螞蟻，」他的朋友答道，「我們還在地面上。」
A Nail Or A Fly?
An old gentleman whose eyesight was failing came to stay in a hotel room with a bottle of wine in each hand. On the wall there was a fly which he took for a nail. So the moment he hung them on, the bottles fell broken and the wine spilt all over the floor. When a waitress discovered what had happened, she showed deep sympathy for him and decided to do him a favour.
So the next morning when he was out taking a walk in the roof garden, she hammered a nail exactly where the fly had stayed.
Now the old man entered his room. The smell of the spilt wine reminded him of the accident. When he looked up at the wall, he found the fly was there again! He walked to it carefully adn slapped it with all his strength. On hearing a loud cry, the kind-hearted waitress rushed in. To her great surprise, the poor old man was there sitting on the floor, his teeth clenched and his right hand bleeding!
釘子還是蒼蠅？
一位視力正在衰退的老紳士住進了一家旅館的客房。他雙手各拿一瓶酒。在牆上有隻蒼蠅，他誤以為是枚釘子。他把兩只瓶子朝上一掛，瓶子掉下來摔碎了，酒灑了一地。一個女服務員發現發生的事情以後，對他深表同情，決定幫他個忙。
於是，第二天早上他到樓頂花園散步時，她把一枚釘子釘在了蒼蠅停過的地方。
這里，老人回到了房裡。倒灑的酒味讓他想起了那件事。他抬頭往牆上一看，蒼蠅又停在了那兒!他輕手輕腳地走近，使盡全力拍了一掌。聽到一聲大叫，好心的女服務員沖進房來。讓她大為吃驚的是，可憐的老頭正坐在地板上，牙關緊咬，右手滴血不止。
I'll See to the Rest
A guard was about to signal his train to start when he saw an attractive girl standing on the platform by an open door, talking to another pretty girl inside the carriage.
"Come on, miss!" he shouted. "Shut the door, please!"
"Oh, I just want to kiss my sister goodbye," she called back.
"You just shut that door, please," called the guard, "and I'll see to the rest."
其餘的事由我負責
一位車上的列車員剛發出信號讓火車啟動，這時他看見一位很漂亮的姑娘站在站台上一節打開的車廂門旁邊，跟車廂里另一位漂亮姑娘在說話。
「快點，小姐!」他喊道：「請把門關上。」
「噢，我還沒有和妹妹吻別呢。」她回答道。
「請把門關上好了，」列車員說：「其餘的事由我負責。」
Chaude and Cold
A patron in Montreal cafe turned on a tap in the washroom and got scalded. "This is an outrage," he complained. "The faucet marked C gave me boiling water."
"But, Monsieur, C stands for chaude - French for hot. You should know that if you live in Montreal."
"Wait a minute," roared the patron. "The other tap is also marked C."
"Of course," said the manager, "It stands for cold. After all, Montreal is a bilingual city."
熱與冷
蒙特利爾自助餐廳的一位顧客擰開盥洗室的龍頭，結果被水燙傷了。「這太可惡了，」他抱怨道，「標著C的龍頭流出的是開水。」
「可是，先生，C代表Chaude－法語里代表『熱』。如果您居住在蒙特利爾的話就得知道這一點。」
「等等，」那位顧客咆哮一聲，「另外一個龍頭同樣標的是C。」
「當然，」經理說道：「它代表冷。畢竟，蒙特利爾是個雙語城市。」
這個網站里還有很多http://wenku..com/view/6b5902aad1f34693daef3eb2.html
❽ 大家還有哪些搞笑的四六級翻譯，笑死我了
英語四級，抄即CET-4，College English Test Band 4的縮寫。是由國家教育部高等教育司主持的全國性教學考試；考試的主要對象是根據教育大綱修完大學英語四級的大學本科生或研究生。 CET4屬於 公共英語等級證書
❾ 4人的英語搞笑小短劇，高一水平的，十分鍾以內
Y: Excuse me, is this your book?
X: Thank you so much.
Y: You are welcome. Are you new admits?
X : yes. We just came to register yesterday. My name is Xiao ling. Nice to meet you. This is my best high school friend Lanlan.
Y: My name is Yani. Nice to meet you, too. This is my friend since childhood, Songtao.
S: hi! We both came from xxx.
L: really? I am from that city, too. We are all town fellows aren』t we?. It』s such a small world.
S: absolutely. We both major in computer science. What』s your major?
X: accounting. I don』t really like it. But my parents said this school offers excellent accounting programs and it will be easier for me to get a job later on.
L: My major is ecation. I want to be a teacher. I think it is cool.
S: I picked my own major because I know what I want. I just like computers a lot. I would like to be a computer programmer in the future.
Y: Well, I don』t know wether I really like it or not. I just follow Songtao where he goes.
X: I feel bad for those students who make it to the top but had to quit school because of financial problems.
S: My parents paid some of my tution and I said to myself that I want to be a somebody. But no matter how much I do, I will never be able to repay my parents for what they have done for me.
L: I think I will find some off campus jobs in summer. I don』t want to be a burden to my family . My parents have been working hard all their lives.
X: Lanlan, you are great.
S: look. The boys are playing basketball now. I will join them. See you !
X: let』s keep in touch, ok?
L: I don』t have a cell phone. Can I send you e-mails?
Y: Sure. Here is my cell phone number. 12345678
And this is my e-mail address. Please write to me.
L: I will.
X: this is mine.:22334455.I am so glad to meet you. Take care!
Y and S: bye 這里還有 不差錢 英文 http://www.hxen.com/yingyujuben/2009-03-04/69956.html
❿ 求四到六人英語搞笑短劇，一定要幽默哦。。。
Three Little Pigs 三隻小豬 Storyteller: There are three little pigs living with 講故事者：三隻小豬和他們的媽媽 their mother. Ding-Ding and Dong- 住在一起。丁丁和東東 Dong are brother pigs. They are very 是豬哥哥，他們很懶，他 Lazy. They eat and sleep all day. 們整天吃了就睡。龍龍是 Long-Long is the youngest pig. She 最小的，她整天幫著媽媽 works all day. She helps her mother 做家務。 to do the housework. Mother pig: You have grown up. You must make 豬媽媽：你們已經長大了，你們得 your own houses. 為自己蓋間房。 Goodbye, little pigs. Build a house. 再見，孩子們。去蓋間房。 Be careful of the wolf. 小心狼。 Pigs: Yes, Mum. Goodbye. 三隻小豬：好的，媽媽。再見。 Wolf: I』m hungry. Look! Three little pigs 狼：我餓了。看，三隻小豬可 for dinner. Mmm. 以做我的美餐。 Sister pig: What are you doing, brothers? 豬妹妹：哥哥，你們在干什麼？ Ding-Ding: I』m building a house with leaves. 丁丁：我在用樹葉蓋房子。 Dong-Dong: I』m building a house with sticks. 東東：我在用樹枝蓋房子。 Sister pig: But leaves aren』t strong. 豬妹妹：可是樹葉不牢固。樹枝也不 And sticks aren』t strong. 牢固。 Brother pigs: Yes, we know. But it』s easy. 豬哥哥：我們知道。但它很容易。 What are you doing, sister? 你在干什麼？ Sister pig: I』m building a house with bricks. 豬妹妹：我在用磚頭蓋房子。 Brother pigs: Bricks! That』s very difficult. 豬哥哥：用磚頭蓋，那太難了。 Sister pig: I know. But bricks are strong. 豬妹妹：我知道，可是磚頭很堅固。 …… Brother pigs: Oh, we』re finished. Let』s have 豬哥哥：噢，我們蓋好了。我們打 a nap. 個盹吧。 Sister pig: My house is finished. My house 豬妹妹：我的房子蓋好了，我的房 is strong. 很堅固。 Wolf: Little pigs. Little pigs. Open your 狼： 小豬，小豬，快開門！ Doors! Brother pigs: No. No. Go away. 豬哥哥：不開，不開。快走開。 Wolf: This is very easy. Sticks and leaves 狼：這太容易了。樹枝和樹葉 aren』t strong. 都不牢固。 Storyteller: The wolf blows the houses down. 講故事者：狼吹倒了房屋。丁丁和東 Ding-Ding and Dong-Dong run 東跑到龍龍家。 to Long-Long』s house. Brother pigs: Help! Help! 豬哥哥：救命! 救命! Wolf: Stop, you two pigs. 狼： 站住，你這兩只小豬。 Brother pigs: Open the door, sister. The wolf 豬哥哥：妹妹，快開門。狼來了， is coming. Let me in. 讓我們進去。 Long-Long: Come in, please. Don』t worry. 龍龍：快進來。別擔心，我的 My house is strong. 房子很堅固。 Wolf: Where did they go? Oh they are 狼：他們跑哪兒了？噢，他們 Here. Little pigs. Little pigs. Open 在這兒。小豬，快把門打 the door! 開。 Three pigs: No. No. Go away. You bad wolf. 三隻小豬：不開，不開。快走開。 你這只惡狼。 Wolf: I』ll blow it down. 狼：我要吹倒它。 Storyteller: The wolf blows and blows. He 講故事者：狼吹呀吹，它不停地吹。 blows and blows. But the house 可是房子非常堅固。 is very strong. Wolf: I』ll hit it. Oh. 狼：我要撞倒它。噢！ Long-Long: Let』s boil the water. 龍龍：我們把水燒開。 Brother pigs: OK. 豬哥哥：好的。 Wolf: Oh, oh! It』s hot. It』s hot. 狼：噢！噢！好燙，好燙。 Three pigs: Hooray! The wolf is dead. The 三隻小豬：好啊！狼死了，狼死了。 wolf is dead Storyteller: Since then, Ding-Ding and Dong- 講故事者：從那以後，丁丁、東東 Dong work hard with Long-Long. 和龍龍一起努力工作。 They work and play together. 他們一起工作，一起玩。
52回答者： 星語秋夢 - 二級 2009-4-7 19:40
我來評論>>
提問者對於答案的評價：呵呵 謝謝了啊 各位！
相關內容